HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned
laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long robe.
If you see husband along the way,
cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower. Use wash cloth, long loofah,
wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo
with 43 added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for
10 minutes until red
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut
and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs.
Rinse off.
Turn off shower
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country..
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
Return to bedroom wearing long robe and towel on head.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed
and leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom.
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her
making the woo-woo sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap..
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
Pee.
Rinse off and get out of shower.
Partially dry off.
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was
hanging out of tub the whole time.
Admire wiener size in mirror again.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor,
and light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her
and make the woo-woo sound again.
Throw wet towel on bed.
If there is anyone who did not laugh at some of the truth behind this,
there is something SO very wrong with you.
Have a great day..... and woo woo!!!
Joke of the day
Moderators: Kup, Ultra Magnus
-
ghostinthemachine
- Aerial Supreme Commander
- Posts: 712
- Joined: Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:36 am
Life Savers
A teacher was doing a study testing the senses (taste) of first graders using a bowl of lifesavers.
The children began to identify the flavors by their color:
Red.......................Cherry
Yellow..................Lemon
Green...................Lime
Orange................Orange
Finally the teacher gave them all HONEY lifesavers. After eating them, none of the children could identify the taste.
'Well,' she said, 'I will give you all a clue. It's what your mother may sometimes call your father.'
One little girl looked up in horror, spit her lifesaver out and yelled, 'Oh my God!! They're a**-holes
A teacher was doing a study testing the senses (taste) of first graders using a bowl of lifesavers.
The children began to identify the flavors by their color:
Red.......................Cherry
Yellow..................Lemon
Green...................Lime
Orange................Orange
Finally the teacher gave them all HONEY lifesavers. After eating them, none of the children could identify the taste.
'Well,' she said, 'I will give you all a clue. It's what your mother may sometimes call your father.'
One little girl looked up in horror, spit her lifesaver out and yelled, 'Oh my God!! They're a**-holes
-
ghostinthemachine
- Aerial Supreme Commander
- Posts: 712
- Joined: Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:36 am
-
Time Traveller
- Father Time (Admin)
- Posts: 6470
- Joined: Mon Dec 29, 2003 1:12 am
- Location: 90482 Orcus
- Contact:
-
Commander Megatron
- Custom Rank 4 U! Ask an Admin!
- Posts: 8745
- Joined: Wed Jul 12, 2006 12:00 pm
- Location: Kolkular
-
ghostinthemachine
- Aerial Supreme Commander
- Posts: 712
- Joined: Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:36 am
-
Time Traveller
- Father Time (Admin)
- Posts: 6470
- Joined: Mon Dec 29, 2003 1:12 am
- Location: 90482 Orcus
- Contact:
-
ghostinthemachine
- Aerial Supreme Commander
- Posts: 712
- Joined: Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:36 am
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
Keep reading-they get better!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WOMEN'S REVENGE
'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet , I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked...
'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MARRIAGE SEMINAR
While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,
Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,
'It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes.'
He addressed the man,
'Can you name your wife's favorite flower?'
Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, 'It's Pillsbury, isn't it?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles..
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.
He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife..
She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?
He answers, 'You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store
to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco
and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo- ooo much cheaper.
So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she.
(I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WORDS
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
'The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you !
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, 'You should do it because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.
The husband said, 'You are in charge of cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'
Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says 'HEBREWS'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home
and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him
at 5:0 0 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him,
when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
Keep reading-they get better!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WOMEN'S REVENGE
'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet , I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked...
'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MARRIAGE SEMINAR
While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,
Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,
'It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes.'
He addressed the man,
'Can you name your wife's favorite flower?'
Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, 'It's Pillsbury, isn't it?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles..
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.
He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife..
She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?
He answers, 'You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store
to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco
and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo- ooo much cheaper.
So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she.
(I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WORDS
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
'The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you !
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, 'You should do it because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.
The husband said, 'You are in charge of cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'
Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says 'HEBREWS'
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home
and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him
at 5:0 0 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him,
when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
Commander Megatron
- Custom Rank 4 U! Ask an Admin!
- Posts: 8745
- Joined: Wed Jul 12, 2006 12:00 pm
- Location: Kolkular
-
ghostinthemachine
- Aerial Supreme Commander
- Posts: 712
- Joined: Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:36 am
yeah CM that one must have been wrote by a woman lol
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies. Suddenly, at 3 o'clock in the
morning, a loud noise came from outside.
The woman, sort of bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man 'Holy crap.
That must be my husband!'
So the guy quickly jumped out of the bed, scared and naked he jumped out the window
like a crazy man. He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bush and then
started to run as fast as he could to his car.
A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and screamed at the woman,
'I AM your husband!'
The woman yelled back, 'Yeah, then why were you running?'
And that, folks.......is how the fight started...
=================================================================
Another One:
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for
Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's
license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had
left my wallet at home.
I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home
and come back later.
The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said,
'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she
processed my Social Security application
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at
the Social Security office.
She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have
gotten disability, too'
And then the fight started.....
===========================================================
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive....
so, I took her to a gas station.....And then the fight started....
=========================================================
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
nearby table.
My wife asked,' Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she
hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?'
And then the fight started.....
====================================================
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and
slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just
get so stressed and little things just seem funny? Well I couldn't believe it....
he was a DWARF!!!
He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT
HAPPY!!!'
I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'
And then the fight started.....
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies. Suddenly, at 3 o'clock in the
morning, a loud noise came from outside.
The woman, sort of bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man 'Holy crap.
That must be my husband!'
So the guy quickly jumped out of the bed, scared and naked he jumped out the window
like a crazy man. He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bush and then
started to run as fast as he could to his car.
A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and screamed at the woman,
'I AM your husband!'
The woman yelled back, 'Yeah, then why were you running?'
And that, folks.......is how the fight started...
=================================================================
Another One:
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for
Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's
license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had
left my wallet at home.
I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home
and come back later.
The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said,
'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she
processed my Social Security application
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at
the Social Security office.
She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have
gotten disability, too'
And then the fight started.....
===========================================================
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive....
so, I took her to a gas station.....And then the fight started....
=========================================================
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
nearby table.
My wife asked,' Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she
hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?'
And then the fight started.....
====================================================
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and
slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just
get so stressed and little things just seem funny? Well I couldn't believe it....
he was a DWARF!!!
He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT
HAPPY!!!'
I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'
And then the fight started.....
-
ghostinthemachine
- Aerial Supreme Commander
- Posts: 712
- Joined: Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:36 am
After 20 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one
evening. Suddenly, she felt her husband begin to fondle her in ways he
hadn't in quite some time. It almost tickled as his fingers started at
her neck, then moved down past the small of her back, caressed her
shoulders and neck. He then slowly worked his hand down over her
chest, stopping just over her lower stomach.
He then proceeded to place his hand on her left inner arm, caressed past
the side of her chest again, working down her side, passed
gently over her buttock and down her leg to her calf. Then, he
proceeded up her inner thigh, stopping just at the uppermost portion of
her leg. He continued in the same manner on her right side, then
suddenly stopped, rolled over and became silent.
As she had become quite aroused by this caressing, she asked in a loving
voice, 'That was wonderful! Why did you stop?'
He said, 'I found the remote'.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This morning on the Interstate,
> I looked over to my left and there was a
> Woman
>
> In a brand new
> Cadillac
>
>
> Doing 65 mph
>
>
> With her
> Face up next to her
>
> Rear view mirror
>
> Putting on her eyeliner.
>
> I looked away
>
> For a couple seconds !
>
>
> And when I looked back she was
>
> Halfway over in my lane,
>
>
> Still working on that makeup.
>
>
> As a man,
>
> I don't scare easily.
>
>
> But she scared me so much;
>
> I dropped
> My electric shaver ,
>
>
> Which knocked
>
> The donut
>
> Out of my other hand.
>
> In all
> The confusion of trying
>
>
> To straighten out the car
>
>
> Using my knees against
> The steering wheel,
>
>
> It knocked
>
> My cell phone
>
>
> Away from my ear
>
>
> Which fell
>
>
> Into the coffee
>
> Between my legs,
>
>
> Splashed,
>
>
> And burned
>
>
> Big Jim and the Twins,
>
>
> Ruined the darn phone,
>
>
> Soaked my trousers,
>
>
> And disconnected an
> Important call.
>
>
> Stupid women drivers
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Next time you use a pair of rubber gloves, you're going to smile when you think of this:
A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous, so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.
'Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked.
'No, I don't,' she replied.
'Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex, and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size.'
She didn't crack a smile.
'Oh, well. I tried,' he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.
'What's so funny?' he asked
'I was just envisioning how condoms are made!'
evening. Suddenly, she felt her husband begin to fondle her in ways he
hadn't in quite some time. It almost tickled as his fingers started at
her neck, then moved down past the small of her back, caressed her
shoulders and neck. He then slowly worked his hand down over her
chest, stopping just over her lower stomach.
He then proceeded to place his hand on her left inner arm, caressed past
the side of her chest again, working down her side, passed
gently over her buttock and down her leg to her calf. Then, he
proceeded up her inner thigh, stopping just at the uppermost portion of
her leg. He continued in the same manner on her right side, then
suddenly stopped, rolled over and became silent.
As she had become quite aroused by this caressing, she asked in a loving
voice, 'That was wonderful! Why did you stop?'
He said, 'I found the remote'.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This morning on the Interstate,
> I looked over to my left and there was a
> Woman
>
> In a brand new
> Cadillac
>
>
> Doing 65 mph
>
>
> With her
> Face up next to her
>
> Rear view mirror
>
> Putting on her eyeliner.
>
> I looked away
>
> For a couple seconds !
>
>
> And when I looked back she was
>
> Halfway over in my lane,
>
>
> Still working on that makeup.
>
>
> As a man,
>
> I don't scare easily.
>
>
> But she scared me so much;
>
> I dropped
> My electric shaver ,
>
>
> Which knocked
>
> The donut
>
> Out of my other hand.
>
> In all
> The confusion of trying
>
>
> To straighten out the car
>
>
> Using my knees against
> The steering wheel,
>
>
> It knocked
>
> My cell phone
>
>
> Away from my ear
>
>
> Which fell
>
>
> Into the coffee
>
> Between my legs,
>
>
> Splashed,
>
>
> And burned
>
>
> Big Jim and the Twins,
>
>
> Ruined the darn phone,
>
>
> Soaked my trousers,
>
>
> And disconnected an
> Important call.
>
>
> Stupid women drivers
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Next time you use a pair of rubber gloves, you're going to smile when you think of this:
A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous, so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.
'Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked.
'No, I don't,' she replied.
'Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex, and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size.'
She didn't crack a smile.
'Oh, well. I tried,' he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.
'What's so funny?' he asked
'I was just envisioning how condoms are made!'
-
ghostinthemachine
- Aerial Supreme Commander
- Posts: 712
- Joined: Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:36 am
HAVING MOM OVER FOR DINNER
You don't even have to be a mother to enjoy
this one...
Brian invited his mother over for dinner. During
the course of the meal,
Brian's mother couldn't help but notice
how beautiful Brian's roommate,
Jennifer, was. Brian's Mom had long been
suspicious of the platonic
relationship between Brian and Jennifer, and this
had only made her more
curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching
the two interact, she
started to wonder if there was more between Brian
and Jennifer than met
the eye.
Reading his mom's thoughts, Brian
volunteered, 'I know what you must be
thinking, but I assure you Jennifer and I are
just roommates.'
About a week later, Jennifer came to Brian
saying, 'Ev er since your
mother came to dinner, I've been unable to
find the beautiful silver gravy
ladle. You
don't suppose she took it, do you?'
Brian said, 'Well, I doubt it, but I'll
send her an e-mail just to be
sure. So he sat down and wrote:
__________________________________________________________
Dear Mom,
I'm not saying that you 'did' take
the gravy ladle from the house, I'm not
saying that you 'did not' take the gravy
ladle. But the fact remains that
one has
been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Love, Brian
__________________________________________________________
Several days later, Brian received an email back
from his mother that
read:
____________________________________________________
Dear Son,
I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep
with Jennifer, I'm not saying that you
'do not' sleep with Jennifer. But the
fact remains that if Jennifer is
sleeping in her
own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by
now.
Love, Mom
You don't even have to be a mother to enjoy
this one...
Brian invited his mother over for dinner. During
the course of the meal,
Brian's mother couldn't help but notice
how beautiful Brian's roommate,
Jennifer, was. Brian's Mom had long been
suspicious of the platonic
relationship between Brian and Jennifer, and this
had only made her more
curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching
the two interact, she
started to wonder if there was more between Brian
and Jennifer than met
the eye.
Reading his mom's thoughts, Brian
volunteered, 'I know what you must be
thinking, but I assure you Jennifer and I are
just roommates.'
About a week later, Jennifer came to Brian
saying, 'Ev er since your
mother came to dinner, I've been unable to
find the beautiful silver gravy
ladle. You
don't suppose she took it, do you?'
Brian said, 'Well, I doubt it, but I'll
send her an e-mail just to be
sure. So he sat down and wrote:
__________________________________________________________
Dear Mom,
I'm not saying that you 'did' take
the gravy ladle from the house, I'm not
saying that you 'did not' take the gravy
ladle. But the fact remains that
one has
been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Love, Brian
__________________________________________________________
Several days later, Brian received an email back
from his mother that
read:
____________________________________________________
Dear Son,
I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep
with Jennifer, I'm not saying that you
'do not' sleep with Jennifer. But the
fact remains that if Jennifer is
sleeping in her
own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by
now.
Love, Mom