2008 darvin awards

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ghostinthemachine
Aerial Supreme Commander
Posts: 712
Joined: Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:36 am

2008 darvin awards

Post by ghostinthemachine »

Enjoy...
>
>
>
> You know you've been waiting for them, so without further ado, here are
> the 2008 Darwin awards.
>
>
> 8th Place
>
> In Detroit , a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water
> after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to
> retrieve his car keys.
>
> 7th Place
>
> A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who 'totally zoned when he
> ran,' accidentally, jogged off a 100-foot high cliff on his daily run.
>
> 6th Place
>
> While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an 8 foot hole for protection
> from the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom when
> it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach
> used their hands and shovels trying to get him out but could not reach
> him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free
> him.Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital.
>
> 5th Place
>
> Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell through the ceiling of a
> bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long
> flashlight he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free rammed into
> the base of his skull as he hit the floor.
>
> 4th Place
>
> Sylvester Briddell Jr., 26, was killed as he won a bet with friends who
> said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth
> and pull the trigger.
>
> 3rd Place
>
> After stepping around a marked police patrol car parked at the front
> door, a man walked into H&J Leather & Firearms, intent on robbing the
> store. The shop was full of customers and a uniformed officer was
> standing at the counter.. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber
> announced a hold-up, he fired a few wild shots from a target pistol. The
> officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, and several customers also
> drew their guns and fired. The robber was pronounced dead at the scene
> by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge
> cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds.
> Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons. No one else was
> hurt.
>
> ....HONORABLE MENTION...
>
> 47 yr old Paul Stiller and his wife Bonnie were just driving around town
> at2 A.M. bored and with nothing to do...they decided to light a quarter
> stick of dynamite, toss it out the window just to see what would happen.
> Apparently they failed to notice the window was closed!!!
>
> ..RUNNER UP..
>
> Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends one evening. When
> one of them said, they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local
> bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation, grew more heated and
> at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM. Upon
> arrival at the midpoint of the bridge, they discovered that no-one
> remembered to bring the bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued
> drinking, volunteered to do the jump and pointed to a coil of lineman's
> cable which lay nearby. They secured one end around Bingham's leg and
> then tied the other to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the
> cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously
> survived his fall into the icy water and was rescued by two nearby
> fishermen. Bingham's foot was never located.
>
>
> AND....THE WINNER IS...!!!
>
> Zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt ( Paderborn , Germany ) fed his constipated
> elephant 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries,
> figs and prunes, before the plugged-up pachyderm finally got relief.
> Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the
> ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded.
> The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr.
> Riesfeldt to the ground, where he struck his head on a rock as the
> elephant continued to evacuate 200 pounds of dung on top of him. It
> seems to be just one of those freak accidents that proves....
> '****sometimes Happens'.
>
> THEY WALK AMONG US...
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